Last updated: April 2026
by Jess Knauf, Director of Client Strategy at Mediate UK. Checked for accuracy by Belinda Atkins, Managing Director at Family Legal Ltd. Information reflects current family law and mediation requirements as of 9 April 2026.

Key Takeaways
- MIAM Certificates If the Other Person Refuses: Yes, you can receive a MIAM certificate even if the other person refuses to attend their own MIAM.
- You and the other person attend separate MIAMs, not the same one, so their refusal does not stop you from going ahead.
- If the other person refuses or cannot be contacted, the mediator can still issue you a certificate confirming that mediation was considered but could not proceed.
- This certificate satisfies the court’s requirement and allows you to file a C100 or Form A application.
- In some circumstances a MIAM exemption may apply, but attending your own MIAM first is almost always the safer approach.
- London Mediation Service offers fast MIAM appointments at Waterloo, St Pancras, and Sutton, or online.
MIAM certificate other person refuses
You can get a MIAM certificate even if the other person refuses to attend, as long as you attend your own MIAM with an accredited mediator. You each attend separately, so the other person’s refusal does not prevent you from getting your certificate. Once your mediator confirms that mediation cannot proceed, they will issue the certificate you need to apply to court.
MIAM Certificates If the Other Person Refuses: If the other person refuses to attend a MIAM, it can feel like you are stuck before you have even started. You need to make a court application, you know a MIAM certificate is required, but the other person will not engage. What happens next?
The good news is that this is one of the most commonly asked questions we get at London Mediation Service, and the answer is straightforward: you can still get your certificate. In this guide, we will explain how the MIAM process works when the other person refuses to attend, what your mediator needs to do, and how to move your case forward.
How Does the MIAM Process Work When There Are Two People?
A common misconception is that both parties attend the same MIAM together. They do not. A Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) is an individual appointment. You attend yours, and the other person attends theirs, usually with the same mediator but at a different time.
The purpose is for the mediator to explain how mediation works, assess whether it is suitable for your situation, and consider whether any exemptions apply. It is not a joint session and it is not an opportunity for the other person to hear your side of things.
This matters because it means the other person’s behaviour does not prevent you from completing your MIAM and obtaining your certificate. Your MIAM is your appointment. If they refuse to come to theirs, that is recorded, and the mediator can still proceed.
What Happens If the Other Person Refuses Their MIAM?
Once you have attended your own MIAM, your mediator will invite the other party to attend theirs. This is usually done by letter, email, or phone. They are given a reasonable period, typically two weeks, to respond and book an appointment.
If the other person refuses, ignores the invitation, or cannot be contacted after reasonable attempts, the mediator will record this and issue you a MIAM certificate. The certificate will indicate that mediation was considered and invited but could not proceed because the other party did not attend.
This satisfies the requirement under the Children and Families Act 2014 that applicants consider mediation before making certain family court applications. The family court accepts this certificate as confirmation that the pre-application requirement has been met.
MIAM Certificates If the Other Person Refuses: What Does the Certificate Actually Say?
The MIAM certificate is a Form FM1. Your mediator completes this after the assessment process. It confirms that you attended a MIAM with an accredited mediator, that the mediator invited the other party, and that mediation could not proceed. The specific reason, whether refusal, non-response, or another factor, is recorded.
You do not need the other person to sign anything. The certificate belongs to you and is submitted with your court application.
Need a MIAM certificate in London? We can help.
Whether the other person is refusing to engage or you simply need to get your MIAM done, London Mediation Service offers fast appointments at Waterloo, St Pancras, Sutton, and online. MIAMs from £99.
How Long Does the Invitation Process Take?
After your own MIAM, your mediator will contact the other party. In most cases, they are given around 14 days to respond. If there is no reply after a reasonable number of attempts, typically two or three contacts, the mediator can reasonably conclude that the other party is unwilling to engage and proceed with issuing your certificate.
In urgent cases, particularly where a child’s welfare is at risk or there is an immediate safeguarding concern, this timeline can sometimes be shortened. If you need things to move faster, it is worth discussing the urgency with your mediator at your MIAM appointment, or booking an urgent online MIAM so the process starts straight away.
“We deal with this situation regularly, especially in London where one party has often already taken legal advice and is ready to proceed with a court application while the other has not engaged at all. The key thing people need to understand is that their MIAM is their own step to take. We invite the other person as part of the process, but if they do not come, that does not hold you back. We record the attempts made and issue the certificate so you can move forward.”
Jess Knauf, Director of Client Strategy, Mediate UK
Are There Situations Where You Can Skip the MIAM Altogether?
There are a number of MIAM exemptions that allow you to make a court application without attending a MIAM first. These include situations involving domestic abuse, a risk of harm to a child, urgency, or where the other party is based abroad.
However, claiming an exemption incorrectly can cause problems later in proceedings. Judges in London family courts are experienced and well-versed in MIAM requirements. If you are in any doubt about whether an exemption genuinely applies to you, attending your own MIAM is almost always the more sensible approach. It is a relatively quick appointment, and it removes any risk of a judge questioning whether you followed the correct process.
If you are unsure whether you qualify for an exemption, our MIAM calculator can give you an initial steer.
What If the Other Person Attends the MIAM But Refuses Mediation?
This is a slightly different situation. If the other person does attend their MIAM but then says they are not willing to try mediation, the mediator will note this and issue your certificate confirming that mediation was assessed but is not suitable or not agreed to proceed.
Again, this gives you the certificate you need. The court does not require both parties to agree to mediation, only that it was properly considered. Mediation is a voluntary process, and it cannot be forced on anyone.
It is worth knowing that the court may still ask parties at a first hearing whether mediation could be reconsidered at a later stage, particularly in children proceedings. Judges in London have a wide range of tools available to them and will often encourage parties to return to mediation even after proceedings have started.
What Types of Court Application Require a MIAM Certificate?
The requirement to attend a MIAM applies to most private family law applications, including:
- Child arrangements applications, made using a C100 form, where parents cannot agree on where a child lives or how much time they spend with each parent
- Financial remedy applications, made using a Form A, for financial matters on divorce or separation
- Applications relating to property and finances between cohabiting couples
- Certain other private law applications under the Children Act 1989
Public law proceedings, enforcement applications, and certain urgent applications are treated differently. For the vast majority of private disputes, however, a MIAM certificate is a compulsory step before the court will accept your application.
Family Law Service
Need Help Completing Your C100 Application?
Once you have your MIAM certificate, Family Law Service can help you complete your C100 form accurately and submit it to the court. A fixed-fee service with no surprises.
Step-by-Step: Getting Your MIAM Certificate When if the Other Person Refuses
Here is how the process works in practice:
Step 1: Book your own MIAM. Contact London Mediation Service or book a MIAM online through Mediate UK. Your appointment is yours alone. You do not need the other person to agree to this.
Step 2: Attend your MIAM. The mediator will explain what mediation involves, ask some questions about your situation, and assess whether it is appropriate. This usually takes 45 to 90 minutes.
Step 3: The mediator invites the other party. After your MIAM, the mediator contacts the other person, usually by letter and email, inviting them to attend their own MIAM. You do not need to do this yourself.
Step 4: The other person refuses or does not respond. If they decline or cannot be reached after reasonable contact attempts, the mediator records this.
Step 5: Your certificate is issued. The mediator completes and signs a Form FM1, confirming that you attended a MIAM and that mediation could not proceed. You can now submit your court application.
Can the Court Penalise Someone for Refusing a MIAM?
The court does have powers to take into account a party’s unreasonable refusal to engage with mediation. Under the Family Procedure Rules, a judge can consider whether a party has acted reasonably in refusing alternative dispute resolution and, in some circumstances, this can influence costs decisions.
This is more relevant in financial remedy proceedings, where costs sanctions for unreasonable conduct are more commonly applied. In children proceedings the focus tends to remain on the child’s best interests rather than on penalising either parent, though a judge may still comment on a party’s unwillingness to mediate.
For you, the practical take-away is simply this: attending your own MIAM demonstrates to the court that you have engaged with the process in good faith. It is a positive step that reflects well on you, regardless of what the other person chooses to do.
Real-World Example: A Father in Hackney Who Needed to Move Forward
A father came to London Mediation Service at our Waterloo office needing to apply for a child arrangements order after his former partner had moved and was limiting his contact with their two children. He had tried to discuss mediation with her informally but received no response. After attending his MIAM, we contacted her by letter and email. She did not respond within the 14-day period. We issued the Form FM1 certificate, and he was able to file his C100 application the following week. The court accepted the certificate without any issue. His case is one of many where the MIAM process worked exactly as it should, even without both parties engaging.
Summary
If the other person refuses to attend a MIAM, you can still get your MIAM certificate and proceed with your court application. MIAMs are individual appointments, not joint ones, so the other person’s refusal does not prevent you from attending yours. Once you have attended, your mediator will invite the other party. If they refuse or do not respond, the mediator records this and issues your Form FM1 certificate confirming mediation was considered but could not proceed.
At London Mediation Service, we deal with this situation on a regular basis. Our mediators are FMC-accredited and experienced in managing cases where one party is reluctant to engage. We can usually arrange appointments quickly and will handle the contact with the other party on your behalf. You can find out more about our family mediation services in London or get in touch to book your MIAM today.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I get a MIAM certificate without the other person’s involvement?
Yes. You attend your own MIAM independently. The mediator then invites the other person separately. If they refuse or do not respond, the mediator can still issue your certificate. You do not need the other person’s involvement in your own MIAM appointment.
How long does it take to get a MIAM certificate if the other person refuses?
The most common timeline is around two to four weeks from your initial MIAM appointment. After your MIAM, the other party is typically given 14 days to respond to the mediator’s invitation. If they do not respond, the certificate can be issued shortly after that period expires.
What does the Form FM1 certificate say when the other person refuses?
The Form FM1 is a standard document completed by the mediator. It records that you attended a MIAM, that the other party was invited, and that mediation cannot proceed. The specific reason, such as the other party declining or failing to respond, is noted. The court accepts this without requiring further explanation from you.
Do I need a MIAM certificate before filing a C100 in London?
Yes, in most cases. Before applying to a London family court using a C100, you must either have attended a MIAM or qualify for an exemption. The C100 form has a specific section for the FM1 certificate details. Without it, the court is unlikely to accept your application.
What if the other person agrees to mediation but then drops out?
If mediation starts but then breaks down, the mediator will issue a Form FM1 recording that mediation was attempted but did not continue. This also satisfies the court’s requirement. You would then be able to proceed with your court application in the same way.
Is there a MIAM exemption I can use instead of going through this process?
There are recognised MIAM exemptions, such as domestic abuse, urgency, or child protection concerns. However, claiming an exemption that does not genuinely apply can cause complications in proceedings. If you are in any doubt, attending your MIAM is simpler and more straightforward than relying on an exemption. An appointment can often be arranged within a few days.
You Might Also Find Helpful
The London MIAM Guide
Read the guide
Ultimate Guide to Attending a MIAM
View the guide
15 MIAM Exemptions Explained
Find out more
The Ultimate Guide to Child Arrangements
Learn more
Ready to Get Your MIAM Certificate?
London Mediation Service offers MIAM appointments at Waterloo, St Pancras, and Sutton, as well as online. Whether the other person is engaged or not, we can help you get your certificate and move forward. Appointments are often available within a few days.
